What Is Abuse? > Am I Abused?

Questions to consider about your relationship. 

How are you/how is your life different from before you were involved with your partner?

How are decisions made in the relationship?

How do disagreements get resolved, if they do?

What are the good times like and how often do they happen?

What kinds of things do you or your partner do separately? 

How does your partner feel when you do things without them?

How does you partner let you know how they feel?

Do you have contact with friends/family/other supports?  How does your partner feel about that?

Have you ever felt afraid of your partner's ability to hurt you?

Has your partner ever touched you in ways that made you uncomfortable or hurt you?

Has there been physical violence by either person?

Is there any name-calling, put- downs, yelling/screaming?

How does sex happen in the relationship?

Has your partner ever touched you in a sexual way that hurts or was uncomfortable without your consent?

Has your partner ever withheld sex as punishment?

Have they ever manipulated or forced you into having sex when you didn't want to?

What would you describe as the worst thing your partner does?

If you share money in any way, whose choice was that?

Who manages and makes decisions about money?

Do you or your partner ever lie? When and about what?

Who makes decisions about children?

Are children ever used as weapons?

Are children around during fights? Have they ever been hurt?